This is going to be a long post; probably going to include a TLDR at the end to summarize and you can decide if you wan't to read the full post.
I'm currently a freshman at SMU, writing this on my father's account. A month ago, on July 20th, he passed away from stomach and esophageal cancer. He told my brother and I about his diagnosis on January 26th, 2018, and I remember thinking about how I would never forget that day. It's been 7 months since that time and I still can't wrap my mind about the how's and the why's.
My dad was a life-long OU fan, and he instilled this same mentality in me from a very young age. Although I was 8, I'll always remember walking past Kevin James in the hallway of some Miami hotel prior to the championship game. I'll never forget the drunk OU fan headbutting a UF fan in the stands, promptly causing his own head to bleed. I'll also remember not really caring about the outcome of the game whatsoever, a quality I wish I still had for numerous reasons.
After that game, my dad would take me to countless others, purchasing season tickets to drive up from DFW even when we were tight on money. The BYU game, the Nebraska B12 champ game right before they left, the Ok state game when we punted twice to name a few.
The main point I want to drive home is that my dad cared a lot about this team, and I began to care a lot too. It was 2014 when I counted 20 sooner t shirts and hoodies in my closet, and I opened up the sugar bowl tickets to go and see the sooners get destroyed by the Crimson Tide. That is the first time I remember pure elation. That's when my dad gave me his account info so that I could log on here and follow all of the inside info on our team and our recruits. I checked this website in between (sometimes during) classes. I checked before I went to sleep. The entire fall semester of school consisted of me looking towards the weekend just so I could watch football.
I became increasingly invested in the players and the coaches. Every game mattered to me. I felt my own happiness becoming tied to the outcomes of these games, and sometimes winning wasn't enough. I saw all of the comments of people becoming increasingly pressed over how the defense was performing or how the offensive play calling was lacking. Some of the comments were mean and derogatory, calling out mere teenagers for not performing well to our standards as we sit on our couches watching them.
My story culminates at the Rose Bowl. I watched Mayfield's first start in person against Akron, and then next week I was in the concourse at an SMU game watching the epic 4th Q and OT against Tennessee. We took the trip up to Columbus this past season, which was one of the greatest days in my life. I remember the scramble to the left, last second pass to Sermon on the sideline for the TD better than what I learned in class last week. Needless to say, the Baker Mayfield-led Sooner teams became my life, and the month leading up to the Rose Bowl in his final season was filled with me anxiously reading over every report of the team. I swore up and down that this was our year; the perfect story book ending was indeed in place to come true. Part of my mind wandered to my dad. It'd been 18 years since he had seen an OU championship, and now he was about to witness one of the most incredible championship stories of all time. My dad was about to enter his 60s and I wondered exactly how many more championships he would get to see.
After the game, I was heartbroken, and I laid face down in my bed for 30 minutes just thinking about it all. I was sad for myself, but my thoughts turned towards my dad and how he deserved this more than anyone I know. No one knew about his eventual diagnosis at the time, but I still felt pain for him.
When the diagnosis did come later in January, I thought about how he was never going to see another Championship for OU. I was angry. I thought about how the game went so wrong, all the players that messed up, all the coaches that just weren't smart enough to get the job done. I logged on this website and revisited some of the threads and realized how wrong I was.
He told me he was not worried about dying, and I wondered how that could be, when I finally realized the reason
Although the sooner football team was my dad and I's biggest connection, I realized how little this sport mattered. All of the time I spent being angry at this team was incredibly foolish. I made a promise that from then on, this team would only bring me happiness, because that is the only emotion I would allow. These players and coaches put their heart and soul into these games and I have the privilege of watching and enjoying them. Criticism is warranted at times, but never to the point where we personally attack these players and coaches. The connection I had with my dad wasn't actually sooner football, but it was instead his kindness and insistence upon me enjoying the best things in life. This team wasn't his life, but instead a means of enjoyment and a way for him to communicate his love to me.
From now on, I'll be watching sooner football with new eyes; eyes that know that the real focus in my life is my family and friends. I hope we all understand how lucky we are to watch this team and to not get too invested into the lives of these college athletes and coaches, they deserve our respect no matter of performance.
Can't wait to watch this season, and I'm not gonna lie, I'm kinda jealous of my dad's seats up in heaven...
TLDR: I contemplate what this team means to me personally as I deal with the death of dad from cancer. I used to be of the mindset where this team literally dictated my happiness sometimes. I now understand that I can still have passion for this team while also understanding that there are far more important things in life than ridiculing 20 year old players and coaches.
I'm currently a freshman at SMU, writing this on my father's account. A month ago, on July 20th, he passed away from stomach and esophageal cancer. He told my brother and I about his diagnosis on January 26th, 2018, and I remember thinking about how I would never forget that day. It's been 7 months since that time and I still can't wrap my mind about the how's and the why's.
My dad was a life-long OU fan, and he instilled this same mentality in me from a very young age. Although I was 8, I'll always remember walking past Kevin James in the hallway of some Miami hotel prior to the championship game. I'll never forget the drunk OU fan headbutting a UF fan in the stands, promptly causing his own head to bleed. I'll also remember not really caring about the outcome of the game whatsoever, a quality I wish I still had for numerous reasons.
After that game, my dad would take me to countless others, purchasing season tickets to drive up from DFW even when we were tight on money. The BYU game, the Nebraska B12 champ game right before they left, the Ok state game when we punted twice to name a few.
The main point I want to drive home is that my dad cared a lot about this team, and I began to care a lot too. It was 2014 when I counted 20 sooner t shirts and hoodies in my closet, and I opened up the sugar bowl tickets to go and see the sooners get destroyed by the Crimson Tide. That is the first time I remember pure elation. That's when my dad gave me his account info so that I could log on here and follow all of the inside info on our team and our recruits. I checked this website in between (sometimes during) classes. I checked before I went to sleep. The entire fall semester of school consisted of me looking towards the weekend just so I could watch football.
I became increasingly invested in the players and the coaches. Every game mattered to me. I felt my own happiness becoming tied to the outcomes of these games, and sometimes winning wasn't enough. I saw all of the comments of people becoming increasingly pressed over how the defense was performing or how the offensive play calling was lacking. Some of the comments were mean and derogatory, calling out mere teenagers for not performing well to our standards as we sit on our couches watching them.
My story culminates at the Rose Bowl. I watched Mayfield's first start in person against Akron, and then next week I was in the concourse at an SMU game watching the epic 4th Q and OT against Tennessee. We took the trip up to Columbus this past season, which was one of the greatest days in my life. I remember the scramble to the left, last second pass to Sermon on the sideline for the TD better than what I learned in class last week. Needless to say, the Baker Mayfield-led Sooner teams became my life, and the month leading up to the Rose Bowl in his final season was filled with me anxiously reading over every report of the team. I swore up and down that this was our year; the perfect story book ending was indeed in place to come true. Part of my mind wandered to my dad. It'd been 18 years since he had seen an OU championship, and now he was about to witness one of the most incredible championship stories of all time. My dad was about to enter his 60s and I wondered exactly how many more championships he would get to see.
After the game, I was heartbroken, and I laid face down in my bed for 30 minutes just thinking about it all. I was sad for myself, but my thoughts turned towards my dad and how he deserved this more than anyone I know. No one knew about his eventual diagnosis at the time, but I still felt pain for him.
When the diagnosis did come later in January, I thought about how he was never going to see another Championship for OU. I was angry. I thought about how the game went so wrong, all the players that messed up, all the coaches that just weren't smart enough to get the job done. I logged on this website and revisited some of the threads and realized how wrong I was.
He told me he was not worried about dying, and I wondered how that could be, when I finally realized the reason
Although the sooner football team was my dad and I's biggest connection, I realized how little this sport mattered. All of the time I spent being angry at this team was incredibly foolish. I made a promise that from then on, this team would only bring me happiness, because that is the only emotion I would allow. These players and coaches put their heart and soul into these games and I have the privilege of watching and enjoying them. Criticism is warranted at times, but never to the point where we personally attack these players and coaches. The connection I had with my dad wasn't actually sooner football, but it was instead his kindness and insistence upon me enjoying the best things in life. This team wasn't his life, but instead a means of enjoyment and a way for him to communicate his love to me.
From now on, I'll be watching sooner football with new eyes; eyes that know that the real focus in my life is my family and friends. I hope we all understand how lucky we are to watch this team and to not get too invested into the lives of these college athletes and coaches, they deserve our respect no matter of performance.
Can't wait to watch this season, and I'm not gonna lie, I'm kinda jealous of my dad's seats up in heaven...
TLDR: I contemplate what this team means to me personally as I deal with the death of dad from cancer. I used to be of the mindset where this team literally dictated my happiness sometimes. I now understand that I can still have passion for this team while also understanding that there are far more important things in life than ridiculing 20 year old players and coaches.
![[zoomLENS]](https://rivals-cdn.s3.amazonaws.com/forums/oklahoma/data/avatars/m/6/6732.jpg?1633963129){kind=avatar}
